Why you should Judge a Book by its Cover

By my estimation I have reached the half way point of my life. I have been betrayed by people who have been my friends for years. I have seen people change so much that they can barely be said to be the same person (save and except that their physical characteristics remain the same.)

It takes years to really know someone, and even then you will most likely not truly understand them. I am being reminded of a dialogue in Ayn Rand’s “The Fountainhead”. I’m paraphrasing the same here -

“What’s the matter with you? Why such talk—over nothing at all? People’s faces and first impressions don’t mean a thing.”

“That, my dear, is one of our greatest common fallacies. There’s nothing as significant as a human face. Nor as eloquent. We can never really know another person, except by our first glance at him. Because, in that glance, we know everything. Even though we’re not always wise enough to unravel the knowledge. Have you ever thought about the style of a soul? … I think, that every human soul has a style of its own. Its one basic theme. You’ll see it reflected in every thought, every act, every wish of that person. The one absolute, the one imperative thing in that living creature. Years of studying a man won’t show it to you. His face will. You’d have to write volumes to describe a person. Think of his face. You need nothing else.”

“That sounds fantastic. And unfair, if true. It would leave people naked before you.”

“It’s worse than that. It also leaves you naked before them.”

The truth is, we do judge people by first impressions. To my female readers, I think you will agree that you avoid men who look, for lack of a better word – “rapist-like”.  On the other hand, we sometimes decide to give people, who look pleasant, the benefit of the doubt.

In the end, your first instinct is usually right and you tend to focus on those few rare instances where you by chance were wrong and conclude that’s it is wrong to judge too quickly. I agree it’s not ideal but it is a great time saving and labour-saving device, and only mildly less accurate.

So go out there, and trust your instinct, and pay attention to first impressions. You may find that your first instinct is usually right, and all the steps you painstakingly take to confirm your suspicions has been a waste of your time.

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Book Review: The Story of a Suicide by Sriram Ayer

Book title: The Story of a Suicide

Author: Sriram Ayer

Rating: 7.8 / 10 

Intro: I think most of us have, at some point of time in our lives, considered suicide as an option. Suicide is often considered as a last resort, but does that make it the worst option? Are those who commit suicide cowards/quitters? “The Story of a Suicide” written by Sriram Ayer and with illustrations by Ghana, compels you to ponder these very questions. The story revolves around teenagers Hari, Charu, Sam and Mani, and the web of secrets, love, passion, revenge and lies that connects them together.

Review: Before you start wondering whether you should buy the hard copy of this book or the Kindle version, I wish to inform you that the book is in the form of a website, and can be accessed for free. If you aren’t really the type who likes to look at a screen for long, or who likes to read (Yes, I know you people exist!) as an audio book version is also available for free download and can be downloaded from here.

The book is a must read for teenagers and adults alike. The dialogues in the book are realistic and makes one feel that they are back in college and facing problems of bullying, groupism and sexual confusion. I personally found the character of Hari, being a wallflower, to be very relatable. Hari’s parents, the Hegde’s, are completely oblivious to the problems which he is facing, though their heart is in the right place. He is also loved by his elder sister, Anjali. Hari also finds solace in his friend Mani who is constantly under tremendous parental pressure. Their friend Charu who seemingly represents the girl-next-door, is also a strong and loveable person who can be relied on. The tech freak Sam is also portrayed very realistically. Although Sam’s actions seem reprehensible, they are also really relatable as there are born of passion.

The characters have to fight many challenges such as cyber-bullying and expressing homosexuality. While they all struggle with their respective problems, one of the characters considers committing suicide. I don’t want to reveal whether he/she does or does, as I do not want to ruin the fun for the readers. The portion of the book that has the most impact is without a doubt the last few paragraphs.

With its simple yet captivating language “The Story of a Suicide” promises to keep one engaged from start to finish. In conclusion I just want to say that the book should not be read with the aim to pass the time, but with the aim to experience what today’s youth do, and to learn their experiences.

Additional Note: I feel I would be remiss in my duties if I did not offer you all some tips and advice on how to deal with depression, break-ups and suicidal tendencies. The author Sriram Ayer has also given detailed list of Do’s and Don’ts on the website and I have found the same is to be very accurate and useful. In addition to the points contained therein I only wish to stress on having a close confidant (or confidants) with whom you can share any sorrow and who will guide you without judgement. All of us, including the youth of today, feel the necessity to keep our true emotions and thoughts bottled up either because we are ashamed what others will perceive us or because we have no one who we can trust completely. When we don’t have someone like that in our lives we feel like there is a hole in our heart and negative emotions just wait to pounce on that weakened heart and take over. Find someone whom you can trust and then pour your heart out to them. But without mutual trust and understand all that will be left in this world is suffering and sorrow. Don’t be too quick in forsaking yourself.  

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